YAY!!!!! UNDETECTABLE

Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding;In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths. Prov.3:5,6
 today my endo dr called today and gave me my thyrogobulin bloodwork back i had to redo it since the lab last fri did it wrong so i had to wait all this time to hear all the news. my scan came out looking good and my thyrogobulin levels came back undetectable for cancer. best news ive heard all yr and i cried when i got off the phone cuz ive been waiting to hear that since i was told i had thyroid cancer. now i see her in 2 months for checkups and labs, to keep it that way. i feel such weight lifted off me but still thinking it can come back so ill have to keep up with my checkups and pray it never comes back and get on with my life and get my body back to having strength if thats possible, i can start my synthroid 2mro am, im so happy to be able to start that again. this has been a long year .. my husband and i have been through alot with each other these last 16 yrs we'll be married 16 in nov. it seems the 2 storms in our marriage was health and money. i had epilepsy when we got married then had brain surgery then he had cancer 3 months after my brain surgery, that took 15 mons to get him cancer free and hes been cancer free 10 yrs now. i always said, i know Mark and I can get through any storm in our marriage as long as we are together and with the Lord on our side, and thats what i believe. i cant wait to tell my hubby parents and sister i can hear them now Praise the Lord!!!! repeated over and over again, not sure what my hubby thought  i txted him first hes at work now but wanted him to know first. but i have an idea what he thought probably what his family will say.
i think i know why the Lord gave me the treatment of RAI and that i needed to be isolated cuz i know if i had any other kind that allows my family to be with me, id still work my house cleaning and cooking etc, and He knew i needed to rest and not work, that week i had RAI i did NOTHING no dishes, vacuuming, laundry just once for Mark. even now i still feel weak and tired from all this and i still cleaned and cooked etc. i dont know when to stop and rest usually when im done or so worn out that id die. most stay at home wives/moms dont know when to stop and take some time for themselves to care for themselves cuz we are so drawn into taking care of our familes then ourselves. so i needed to be ioslated so that i could rest and i know then i needed it but never wouldve if my family was home with me. God gave me that answer a few weeks ago, and it made sense. God knows what i need even when i dont. i hated being alone, but there had to be a reason why when i hate being alone and want someone here with me when im sick i cant, and mark when he had chemo he didnt want anyone around but could there are lessons in both and i got my answer as to why but not sure mark did on his course he rather forget he had cancer at all, me im thinking what am i going to learn from this experience, and i have learn ALOT!
i forgot how much i loved to bake from scratch and missed fishing which i didnt fish too much this yr but did some fishing with my family. I learned my husband does pray for me i never knew that before, that meant alot to me that he told he does. Mark took me to my dr appts and was there for me. he never took me to my appts after i got my drivers license. and when he took before he never went in with me like he did with these ones.
now if i can get a normal life again i know i have to find a new normal , i need to start taking care of me too and not neglect myself i always thought id be selfish if i did but learned its not cuz when i take care of myself im doing for my family too. this is like God opening my eyes to see i need to take care of me cuz i am God's child and He wants me to care for me too. i always thought husband and child first then me.
now if i can stay cancer free for like my husband is, i want to better my life and lose some weight that i gained through all this and gain strength and exercise. clean my head, and heart out, grow in faith as i have this yr when i thought i thought i lost it, grow spiritually closer with the Lord and with my husband and daughter. when i can get my first relationship on track which is the Lord, thats when i can get my marriage on track where it should be and be closer to my hubby which i know he is a gift from God, then my daughter who is my miracle. i thank God for both of them everyday that He put mark and i together and gave us our daughter.
But He said, "The things which are impossible with men are possible with God." Luke 18:27
 For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. 2 Tim 1:7

almost there

i just love this picture i want to be that kind of woman.......

 

well today i had my pills for my scan tomorrow to see if i need another RAI. the last 2 weeks seemed like forever not being able to eat what i want. i did eat more this time than last time since i kno what im eating now. i still feel weak and tired and out of breath and  having twinges in my chest like before but not as bad as before. i cant believe i said i cant wait til i can be back on synthroid again ill be off it 3 weeks this wednesday. I know the Lord is the one who go me through this last 2 weeks of the LID. He gave me the strength to keep going. now if i can get through this week of my scan and stuff. i got really irate today my endo doc didnt call me til i was on the road to tell me i can have the pills for scan i had to see what my bloodwk was if i can have the scan. i called them 2xs and Mark was the first to call them to call me. when i called the lady knew i was mad when i told her they said they would call when my hubby called in a few mins HA ya right, then i called oh we'll call u soon then the 3rd time i told her they were suppose to call 3 hrs ago!!!!! to say the least they shouldnt mess with a thyroid cancer patient who hasnt had real food in 2 weeks and more or synthroid for 3 weeks. i had appt for 130 today to get pills and takes an hr altogether to get there with my mom in law driving 30mins to my house and then another 30 down after my house.
i have been noticing my pulse is low but my BP is ok this time so far. i had problems before about a month after my treatment. if i dont need a treatment my mom  wants to come and take me and ash and her to Olive Garden for my first good meal. i cant wait til i can Mark took me to my last night i could eat good.
 now i have a bad headache and am very  cold, tired and weak ive been sleeping better. but thats because im not on a high dose of synthroid like before, and im hoping for a neg scan so they can try and put me on a normal dose so maybe i can sleep better on it. i feel like there is something in my throat all the time it drives me crazy.
i just need some more strength to get through this week and i know God will He always will. i need to trust Him more .. sometimes i feel like the engine that could, saying i think i can i think i can and sometimes i said no i cant but God tells me yes u can....... Wait on the LORD; Be of good courage, And He shall strengthen your heart; Wait, I say, on the LORD! Psalms 27:14. i read this verse this morning in my favorite authors books on power of prayer. i know i have been alitte anxious on this week thinking i could still have cancer, but God's Word says....Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Phil. 4:6,7..... i just have to keep reminding myself that all the time. well  probably write more later this week to say whats going on i hate when things are up in the air.......

Day 4 of LID

Today was day 4 of my low iodine diet and first day i feel crumby. i have been canning for the last week to get it all done before i started to not feel good. I have been eating more since this time around i know what i can eat before i starved cuz i was confused by it all. im starting to walk slower and am more tired but i have been sleeping more i actually slept 5 straight hrs for the last 2 nights, but it could have been from all the canning ive done, i have done tons of tomatoes and did some pickled beets, i was doing only one canner a day to not wear me out but the closer i got to not feeling well the more i wanted it all done and now i am all done with it today i did the last of the canning. now my body aches i cant wait til this is all over with, but have been praying that God gives me the strength to get through it all. I have been cold lately which i knew i would be. And Ashley asked me a question about a history question and i couldnt concentrate on it. All i need is a negative scan to not do this diet again and then they can put me on a normal dose of synthroid, then just check my levels every so often as whenever they check it.

 

i love this picture of the Bible cuz i believe its true mine must not be falling apart to bad even tho some of the binding n leather part is cracked cuz i sometimes feel like im falling apart.


tomorrow im doing nothing but laying on the couch and resting, and homeschooling Ash. i already feel like my mind if getting foggy in the morning as i read the Bible and another book i sometimes have to read the same line over again cuz it didnt sink in my brain. the longest i stayed down today was when my cousin called me for about 40 mins or so tonight. And i know my moods are getting to me feeling cranky and feeling like i want to cry. I cant seem to even think what i want to type in here so i guess ill leave with this verse from Phil. 4:13......I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

time to get started

Today was my last day to take my Synthroid, for 3 weeks. Its gonna be weird waking up between 3-5am to take it and remembering i cant take it. Sunday the 9th i start the dreaded diet, i let my mother-in-law to read over my LID cookbook to see if she can make me stuff for diet.
 But i have to believe the the Lord will help me through this, and that He will give me the strength i need to get through it all. it has been a comfort to hear that there are people who are praying for me, especially my husband.  Yesterday i started to read a book from my favorite author Stormie Omartian and found this verse,  And He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness." I know i need to look to God for strength even tho i have felt He left me but i know from yrs of memorizing verses and sitting in church that God never leaves us. But i have to be reminded of it.
I dread getting tired and weak just hope i dont get bad like i was last time, i was hypothyroid longer last time with 2 surgeries and never been on meds for it, this time ill only be hypo for 3 weeks or so not like months. just hoping it will go by quickly.
there has been alot i learned in this past year with cancer, i have found my strength in God, my family and my praying friends, i cant give up cuz there are people who need me around like the 2 i live with and love with all my heart. i thank God just about everyday for bringing them into my life. i want it to be everyday like it was before i just need to start back into my prayer life. I have always been weak in my prayer life, and dont know how to strengthen it my husband has a strong prayer life and i only wish i could have that as well. But I love to read God's Word and study it i dont have any problem with that. I keep thinking of a friend who gave me some good advice along with the Sunday School class she taught, it takes 28 days to make something a good habit, i have done so with the Bible and now its like, first thing i do when i get up is grab my Bible, and its so natural for me. Now i wish i can just apply that to my prayer life. But i have always been insecure about why would the Lord want to hear from me, why does He love me for i always felt i was an unlovable person, why would people love me why would my husband love. all i can understand it the love of a mother since i am one, i know now why my mom loves me cuz there isnt anything i wouldnt do  for my daughter. shes one reason why i have to fight this cancer, i understand why my husband fought his cancer, for Ashley, she deserves to have both parents around, she doesnt remember daddy having cancer but she will remember mom having cancer and i hate that she will remember, and she worries about me all the time and i dont like that she does she shouldnt have to be worrying about me,  but i guess i cant do anything about it. But i am also fighting cancer for my husband too, even tho he may not know it and even if he didnt fight for me when he had cancer.
I hate it when people say thyroid cancer "is the good cancer" it irritates me cuz i think there is NO good cancer. Cancer is cancer and cancer is BAD, all of it. im not the only one who thinks that everyone that i talk to online that had or has thyroid cancer all feel the same way. even the drs call it the good cancer its not. we still get sick, tired, weak, we may not lose our hair cuz of our RAI treatments, i was nauseated after my treatment and lost my taste too. And my mind was like mud during the hypo time not fun at all i always messed up my sentences and spelling even when i knew how to spell it, and what i want to say comes out wrong and am more forgetful then i was before i find myself having to write things down in order to remember it later, i had a hard time driving no reflexes at all. Just like with every cancer thyroid cancer people just want it over with and cant wait to hear we are cancer free that all anyone wants to hear with any cancer, I still get nervous when my husband goes to his cancer checkup and its been 10 yrs now hes been free, and now that all i want to hear i wont know til i have my scan on sept 25 the waiting is.....AHHHHHHHHH I HATE WAITING .. cuz i keep thinking if i get a positive scan i have to have another RAI  and then wait another 6 months and do this over again my mom could tell  anyone patience wasnt one of my strong thing to be. i have learned patience through homeschooling and parenting and being a wife.  i will end with this verse i have always repeated whenever im afraid my childhood pastor gave it to me once...
 Whenever I am afraid, I will trust in You. In God (I will praise His word), In God I have put my trust; I will not fear. What can flesh do to me? Psalm 56:3,4  this became one of my favorite verses.