feeling somewhat better

i feel better than i did in the last blog thing, i was at my moms and she made me eat lol. now im home and barely eat now but i do. saw my family dr last  monday and he wants me to have a stress test, thurday. so i have to go get that done UGH, hes worried about my heart since he told me that they should have had me off my high BP pills during my thyroid cancer treatment RAI. my BP is low now the dr always thought i had high BP but never believed him. but now its low to where hes worried about it. had my first bloodwork done on the synthroid im on did that last  monday as well. they called me  last monday night  its right on target where they want it so im staying on 200mcgs. i still feel tired and fatigue. and when i over do around the house i feel dizzy and lighheaded. but yesterday my daughter made me stay down and she washed the dishes for Mother's Day, i loved it. and i thought i was done seeing docs lol i have a follow up with fam june 4th, then in aug see my endo doc and sept is my checkup to see if i need RAI again.
May is a good month and a nerve wreaking month our daughter turns 13 in a week, tomorrow my Mark goes to get his bloodwork for hes yearly cancer visit and next tues is hes dr appt to stay if he is 10 yrs cancer free. i think he will be i hope so its great to hear he is cancer free. i cant wait to hear it myself as well some day. never thought id ever get thyroid cancer, for one i never heard of it, and its an unusal cancer. course i had to get the most unusal cancer. im unusal i guess.
I just want to feel better and have the energy i had. never  thought it would take so much out of me its not like i got chemo like my husband where he was sick all the time and throwing up and saw sick ppl all the time at the cancer center he went to. the part i hated the most was the LID i didnt want to eat anything by the 5th day. and feeling very weak from being hypothyroid where i couldnt keep up with Mark when we walked into the place i  got my RAI from, usually its him who cant keep up with me, and i still cant catch up to him, this month when i went grocery shopping i had to make more days to get them then i do cuz i get so tired when i shop.
at least i know im not the only one going through this with heart racing and BPs being low my sister in law said she talked to someone who went through what i went through. and i thought i was the only one. guess it affects people differently then other and some the same.
I still have a hard time getting up in the morning like i use to get up, i cant sleep well at night anymore takes me along time to fall asleep and i wake up alot in the night more than i use to before all this. i still feel down and alone, like im still in this dark place where i cant find my way out and dont see the end, i dont see where God is taking me i feel lost, and i dont know who to talk to about this mark dont understand it hes like what do u mean dark place and i feel i lost my faith i said that to him and he didnt understand that either. im tired of feeling this way and always feeling like i want to sleep all the time. I WANT TO SLEEP all night for once and actually feel like i got the rest i need.. i hope when i get checked again in sept that i wont need another treatment, and i know that sept is thyroid cancer awareness month and i get checked again that month. guess we will have to wait and see, my mom dont understand the wait but from what i read i understand it she thinks everything has to be done all the same day lol but of course she just wants me healthy again and im her daughter and im not suppose to get sick in her eyes... id be worried about my daughter too id never want her to be sick in anyway.