Whenever I am afraid, I will trust in You.In God (I will praise His word), In God I have put my trust; I will not fear. What can flesh do to me? Psalms 56:3-4
well today i got my RAI treatment i had to take 2 pills. Mark took and brought me home. Ashley was picked up by Mark's sister before my treatment, and Mark went down there again after he took me home. where i have treatment his sister lives about 20 miles south of there and we live 30 miles north so it was mid way. but Mark had to go through the same town twice. now i have to drink alot to help get this out of my system. sunday night i can eat real food again, which Mark will buy me 2 fish sandwiches and fries from mcds im so hungry for them, and the monday morning i start that levothyroxine ( synthroid) my endo dr will start me on 200 mcg they are tiny pills. hopefully ill get some strength back i feel so tired and thought id pass out today. Marks gonna check up on me everyday hes at work so ill see him but i wont see him this weekend til he brings me my mcds on sunday. this will be the first we cant watch "our" show together sunday night we love to watch Army Wives thats the one show we agree on watching and spend time together and ill miss our "tea time" we make each others teas at night. i miss them already even before they left im stuck at home alone and i hate especially at night i usually cant sleep when im here alone or even with Ashley here. its Mark i miss i cant sleep good when hes not here which i think it should be that way i mean we are married 15 yrs and hardly ever apart from each other only a few times we havent been together. Mark even said he cant sleep when im not home or with him i guess thats a good thing:) means he misses me i wonder how he will sleep at his sisters house. i wont be able to see him on his bday only a few mins and cant hug him or kiss him happy bday his bday is thurs i filled out his card today before treatment so when he comes on his bday he can have it. just before we went into where i had to be we hugged and kissed for the last time for a week.
as far as what they told me the prescan didnt show that it spread which is a good thing and they said the pills they gave me would do the job i hope so i hope i dont have to do this again later on that it will be done and over with but God is in control and i trust Him. i was alittle anxious about today this morning when i woke up cuz i didnt want my family to leave me, but i know its safer for them and i want to protect them from this. they both can come home next friday which im gonna pick Ashley up after my post scan on fri and Mark will come home after work. Mark seems to be alot more concerned about me lately he keeps asking me if im feeling ok and doing ok he even prayed with me before he left today which made me cry i never heard him pray for me, and it gave me such comfort and lifted my spirits.
i hope i dont get nausated from this i havent yet thats one thing i cant stand it to be sick to my stomach they said it may happen but who knows .. i dont know if hypothyroid causes ringing in the ears but seems like my ears are ringing like crazy for the last week or so.
i know im weak in my body when Mark walks faster than me now, usually im faster then him and today he chuckled at me saying wow u really slowed down i couldnt keep up with him and it wasnt that far to walk either it feels like a ran a marathon even walking up my stairs in my home im out of breath. i think its sad when i walk into the nuclear medicine part of the hospital they said hi Lori or theres Lori lol without me saying who i am i was there tues, wed, thurs, and fri this week.....
i sat in the back seat on the way home and cried all the way home cuz i know when i get home im gonna be alone with my husband or daughter i love them so much. but i know im not alone cuz the Lord it with me and he will comfort me and protect me through the night. my mother-in-law gave me a verse one time when i was afraid to be here alone and its.........
I will both lie down in peace, and sleep; For You alone, O LORD, make me dwell in safety. Psalms 4:8
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