I saw this picture on facebook and loved it, it really shows someone who reads hes Bible all the time, and always uses it. i only wish i could say i use my Bible just as much. In some places my Bible is falling apart but not bad. The verses I read this morning really goes with this picture.
Your word I have hidden in my heart, That I might not sin against You! I will meditate on Your precepts, And contemplate Your ways. I will delight myself in Your statutes; I will not forget Your word. Psalm 119: 11, 15-16
These are just some of the verses i love in the Bible. In this last week I have been changed, I started to pray again last week and kept up with it and i feel so much better in my faith then i was before in the last few months, when i felt lost and alone. I know I am not alone that God was with me the whole time but i didnt see it. I have fallen and God was there and picked me right back up, and isnt that what parents do to their children, and have them try to get up themselves after they learn a lesson but i know i cant stand without God holding me up. God just waits for us to come to Him and asks for help, cuz He wants us to completely depend on Him. He is so patient to wait for us to call on Him to lift us up and He is always there to lift us. He was patient on me and working in me some lessons He wanted me to learn. I feel my faith has stregthens since all this thyroid cancer, and my physical strength is coming back as well.
I still get tired and weak but i have to know my limits and i have been trying to go on short walks to build my muscles back to where they were before. I still have trouble with tasting still but have been trying to eat better and have been losing weight which i like cuz id like to lose some. I am still stressing about what is gonna happen in Aug-Sept when they check me again to see if i still have cancer and need another treatment or not, but i know i need to trust the Lord cuz He is already there in the future, and He knows what will happen. I just hate the waiting period. Even tho it seems like the last 6 months went by fast cuz i really dont remember those months since my brain was in a fog and when i read back on here what i wrote it makes me sad that i dont remember typing them let alone feeling all the darkness i was in, when i think back to that everything is black to me. The months i have to wait to see if the RAI worked is going very slow for me, all i want is to hear is.... we cant find anymore cancer and so far you are in remission. But i will have to see when that time comes. I still have in my head what my endo doc said to me when i saw her the first time " Dont expect to be cancer free in 6 months" real nice to hear yes i want to be cancer free in 6 months. And im sure she has to go the route of worse case senerio to be safe, but hated to hear that. I can see it I get all my taste back and feel good again just in time for them to say well start ur LID and come for a scan, then to have them tell me u need another RAI and then comes all the sickness i had in march and april, i dont want to go back to feeling like i did in them months it was horrible. But i cant keep thinking about it even tho i know some of that will come and i have to do some of that to see but i need to trust God and He knows whats ahead. I hate being the sick one, im the one in this family who takes care of them who are sick not the one being taken care of. Im use to worrying about my hubby when he had cancer and trying my best to get thru that with him. Now the shoes have been switched and im the one with cancer, and we are going thru that the other went thru before. i dont know how Mark went through my cancer but i remember what i went through with him and wasnt fun at all i was scared everyday he had cancer wondering if i was gonna lose him. Mark wouldnt talk to me about any of the last few months and how he handled all this. I dont know if he ever worried about me when i was in the ER 4xs in a week. I know how Ash took it our daughter i know she was worried and i hate that shell remember her mommy having cancer, with her daddy she was only 2 when he had cancer. well i guess im rambling so i better stop and leave one last verse for today..
But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you."Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble. Matthew 6:33-34
No comments:
Post a Comment